D-Bar Review

I had been to the Debasement Bar three times before, once over the summer with a friend from home and twice with friends from school. My feelings about the experiences can be fairly summarized in all cases by the word ‘embarrassment’: with my hometown friend I was embarrassed to be associated with the scene, and with my school friends I was simply embarrassed for the scene. So naturally when I returned to the bar for a fourth time, my spirits were not high.

The Debasement Bar, invariably called ‘the D-Bar’ by its patrons, is the Graduate College’s local watering hole, where graduate student members must sign-in even undergrads. The bar is so local, in fact, that it is literally in the basement of the main Graduate building. This alone must explain the bar’s moniker, for there’s certainly nothing debased about the place. The physical space itself is reminiscent of a poorly lit Café Viv—cramped with too-clean tables and adorned with dorky memorabilia. In the words of an anonymous grad student, “It looks like a suburban basement and has the personality of my grandma’s house.”

Fortunately, the D-Bar has a wide selection of discounted drinks. There are always several fine beers on tap, from Yuengling, the $2 house special, to Storm King, a microbrew that costs a couple bucks more. In addition, there’s a full wet bar and a fridge packed with bottled domestics and imports, all at a reasonable price. Another attraction might be the legend that the D-bar used to be “hopping,” with women regularly dancing on top of the bar. However, my source for this legend also told me that the D-Bar offers “free beer and loose women.” This is false.

But back to that return visit. I had come with a couple friends and, much to our surprise, when we arrived we found a DJ playing extraordinarily loud, hip music in a bar packed wall-to-wall with people. A long line wound its way to the bar, and soon a band took to a makeshift stage tucked in the back corner. They used live instruments to make mash-ups: verdict, so awful it was good (think Audioslave + Beastie Boys). Then my friends and I met a couple gregarious grad students (really!) who perked up at the mention of driving to the Street and on their way out the door this group of five men bumped into a 27-year-old Asian toxicologist and self-proclaimed band groupie who joined them on their journey without a second thought. The whole experience that night was redemptively whacky; this was, after all, a place for which I'd once felt something like pity."

I guess the moral of the story is this. As a rule of thumb, go to the D-bar either because you (a) want reasons not to attend graduate school, or (b) want to feel better about yourself. You might also go if you’re feeling lucky. Though odds are it will be another evening at grandma’s house, you might just find yourself an adventure.—Matt Knauff